Post by johnstone56 on Nov 29, 2011 11:14:50 GMT
;D ;D
Here's another for today
The wife was counting all the 1p's and 2p's out on the kitchen
table when she suddenly got very angry and started shouting and
crying for no reason. I thought to myself, "She's going through the change."
When I was in the pub I heard a couple of plonkers saying that
they wouldn't feel safe on an aircraft if they knew the pilot was a
woman. What a pair of sexist twits. I mean, it's not as if she'd
have to reverse the bloody thing!
Local Police hunting the 'knitting needle nutter' who has
stabbed six people in the last 48 hours, believe the attacker
could be following some kind of pattern.
Bought some 'rocket salad' yesterday but it went off before I could eat it!
A teddy bear is working on a building site. He goes for a tea
break and when he returns he notices his pick has been stolen. The
bear is angry and reports the theft to the foreman. The foreman grins at
the bear and says "Oh, I forgot to tell you, today's the day the teddy bears
have their pick nicked."
Murphy says to Paddy "What ya talkin to an envelope for?"
"I'm sending a voicemail ya thick sod!"
Just got back from my mate's funeral. He died after being hit on
the head with a tennis ball. It was a lovely service.
19 paddies go to the cinema, the ticket lady asks "Why so many
of you?" Mick replies, "The film said 18 or over."
An Asian fellow has moved in next door. He has travelled the
world, swum with sharks, wrestled bears and climbed the highest
mountain. It came as no surprise to learn his name was Bindair Dundat.
He He
