Post by simmo123 on Mar 7, 2011 0:07:54 GMT
Hi again folks,as you know i spend a fair bit of time in Nursing homes & the like with my Oldies concerts & some of the folks there have a wicked sense of humour,in fact i received this joke from one of the long term residents which i thought i would share with the forum,i hope you dont take offense but its great that the folks who are long term residents & in a lot of cases are shunned by there families can still retain their sense of humour...Simmo...booking he's room in advance...the other comical thing that often occurs in the really bad dementia homes is that when i am packing up my gear after a concert i get offers from a few of the patients asking if they can help me carry my guitar out to the car,anyway enjoy the the following...Nursing home sex...
Harold is 95 and lives in a Senior Citizen Home.
Every night after dinner, Harold goes to a secluded garden behind the Center to sit and ponder his accomplishments
and long life.
One evening, Mildred, age 87, wanders into the garden. They begin to chat and before they know it, several hours
have passed.
After a short lull in their conversation, Harold turns to Mildred and asks, 'Do you know what I miss most of all?'
She asks, 'What?'
'Sex!!' he replies
Mildred exclaims, 'Why you old fart. You couldn't get it up if I held a gun to your head!'
'I know,' Harold says, 'but it would be nice if a woman could just hold it for a while.'
Well, I can oblige,' says Mildred, who unzips his trousers, removes his manhood and proceeds to hold it. Afterward,
they agree to meet secretly each night in the garden where they would sit and talk and Mildred would hold Harold's
manhood.
Then one night Harold didn't show up at their usual meeting place. Alarmed, Mildred decided to find Harold and
make sure he was O.K.
She walked around the Senior Citizen Home where she found him sitting by the pool with Ethel, another female resident,
who was holding Harold's manhood!
Furious, Mildred yelled, 'You two-timing son-of-a-bitch! What does Ethel have that I don't have?'
Old Harold smiled happily and replied, 'Parkinson's.'
